Have you ever asked yourself, "Why does this keep happening to me?"
Well, as it turns out, life isn't being unfair to us, and what is happening is not likely anybody else's fault. There is a pretty good chance that we're just being taught a lesson. Is the lesson about gratitude, humility, empathy? Or is it a lesson about seeing something from someone else's perspective?
It happens to all of us when we haven't yet learned the lesson that life wants to teach us. We can ignore the lesson, or we can "recognize" what is happening, learn the lesson, and move forward to the next one!
The more quickly we can recognize and manage the behaviors that inhibit growth, the healthier we are, and the more we have to offer each other.
Stop the Drama
We all talk about drama, but it is always interesting that our perspective is that it is always the other person who is creating it. Can that be possible? Can it really always be the other person?
Even though drama is more often associated with the female gender, drama is an equal opportunity offender.
Making sure that your relationship is a drama-free zone means that neither of you will create drama!
The Spiritual Connection
Spirituality is a very broad concept that incorporates a vast array of very personal ideals.
People often confuse spirituality with religion. Religion has rules; spirituality does not. Religion is based on repercussions, while spirituality is based on internal peace. Religion TELLS you what the truth is, while spirituality is whatever you discover. Religion is a belief in the experience of others, while spirituality is about recognizing and living your own experience.
Spirituality is only about you, your values, and how you perceive the world. It's merely the conscious recognition of who you are and how you think. That may or may not include religion.
Have you ever found yourself repeating the same unhealthy patterns in all of your relationships, each time hoping for different results?
When it comes to relationships, whether it’s dating the “wrong” person (again and again) or engaging in relationship-sabotaging behaviors, we can start to understand ourselves and others better when we look at “Attachment Style”.
Our attachment style impacts all types of relationships from partner, to parents, to child, to friends and neighbors. There is nothing more important to understand about yourself and your partner than your attachment style!
Understanding Each Other
Men don't understand women; women don't understand men. Generations don't understand each other. Political views. Religion. Social Standing. Common sense. Education. Communication. Language. Country of origin. Colour of skin. Profession.
We all come from different places, have had different upbringings, by different parents, in different settings. We have different educations, experiences, traumas, lifestyle, dream, and desires.
Let's see if we can find some common ground.
Can we even live without social media? Well, yes we can, but there are many good things about social media that we don't want to lose. What we need to understand is how not to let social media impact our relationships in a negative way.
Social media can be more addictive than alcohol or drugs. It's vital that we learn to use social media as a tool and not as a crutch. It's easy to start paying more attention to our devices than we are to our loved ones.
It's almost impossible to create or grow a relationship once social media starts to dominate and take our attention away from what is right in front of us.
All of us have some trigger or “hot button,” that, when pushed, sets us off into uncomfortable emotions that may even lead to anger, hostility, fear, and ultimately, our bad habits. Does that happen to you sometimes? All the time?
You may have heard of “trigger warnings” or “getting triggered”. However, what does “getting triggered” mean, and how can you control it?
It is worth putting in the effort to explore your emotional triggers. The more aware you are, the less you will be ruled by your unconscious programming.
Many people do not recognize their unhealthy relationship patterns.; yet, if they are consistent enough, we should be able to recognize them, and if we can recognize them, maybe we can adjust them!
For example, being consistently attracted to the wrong people could be a symptom of falling into the same pattern over and over without realizing there is a way out.
We do this because it is familiar, even if it doesn't work out in the long run. Even though it isn't healthy, we get comfortable and dive in anyway.
Let's learn more!